ElCapitanEl's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[Ninja Guiji]

"Splinter Cell" or "Metal Gear" this aint.

Uninspired in every way, this game falls completely, completely flat.

In an attempt to capitalize on the popularity of sneak-and-shoot games like Metal Gear Solid, Splinter Cell, and Castle Wolfenstein, this game is a top-down ninja-inspired piece of fetid dingo's kidneys.

The author thought it would be sage to simplify the controls of the game to make it more accesible to the player - a piece of advice taken well by Halo engineers, but not by Fable designers.

The result, however, was that the gameplay was crap. Attacking an enemy is done automatically, defined by proximity, and the mode of death is random. In order to engage in actual combat with an enemy the player had to be literally directly in front of the enemy for an extended period of time. With all the random- and unanimated- movements of the samurai, this is nearly impossible. Avoiding detection is ridiculously easy, as the enemies in this game make Koopa Troopas look like Sir Henry Clinton.

The combat engine was so simplistic that it was far more annoying than fun. Even now, after having beaten the game, I still don't know if the combat was turn-based or not - it all seemed confusing and random.

All in all the game plays like an idiot's wet dream. It requires zero skill, but is extremely violent. Anyone with any love for videogames should avoid this game or else it might just wound your soul.

GUIJI responds:

If you had any kind of autority in anything you do in your real life, you wouldn't need to play this little '' hard critic '' role of yours. It is an evidence.

Thanks for playing my game

[Disco Balls]

Yeargh

Odd and interesting concept.

Conceivably fun gameplay.

This, however, was extremely poorly executed.

Essentially this game handles like "Asteroids" and its many clones, the difference being that it is a "change the color" game with a vs/time trial twist, rather than a puzzler. An added dimension of character selection driven by statistics seemed to be a logical choice.

The result is, however, just a weird game with a weird premise and sloppy handling.

In the words of Zaphod Beeblebrox: "Ten out of ten for style, but minus several million for good thinking."

jackcole responds:

I'm trying to respond to some of these comments, but a lot of them are the same or similar so I'm not hitting every one.

Asteroids actually never came to mind when I was working on this. It all came together kind of by accident. I was originally working on an engine to handle grid-type puzzle and board games when my son was flipping channels and stayed on reruns of American Gladiator on ESPN Classic... specifically during the event where 4 guys get into these giant round cages and roll them around trying to avoid or hit each other.

The controls seem to be a love/hate thing. I've just uploaded an update with some slight tweaks to the control and I will be working on a version with an alternate control scheme. Other than the control issues, is there anything specific you think should be changed?

[Nephi's Adventure]

Huh

I always assumed they were Mexican from their dress and appearance. Not until this game did I realize they were supposed to be Jewish. Go figure.

BoMToons responds:

Ha, you're welcome to think they're whatever race you please...but they were supposed to be olden-days Jewish...if not a little dark in complexion.

[SMASH!: Reloaded]

....

DISCOVERED the theory of relativity?

DISCOVERED A THEORY?!

Smoking-Chimney responds:

Yeh, I thought about that too, it should've been suggested, but after 536 questions you don't think of things like that :D Thanks for the review!

[Treasure Assault v0.9]

Crap

I will play this game again when you get rid of the damned song. As a musician, it completely offends me. And I just cant TAKE it!

Aldarnc responds:

Heh... some people love it some people hate it...

[Vanguard Mercenary]

Kick Ass Game

The story and unique weapons set-up gave this game my 5. This could easily become a TV Show, should you choose to write a pilot.

The only real beef I have with it, is that when you die you go back to the beginning of the dialouge. I just heard it, I don't need to hear it again! And often times I spend more time listening to what I just heard than playing, just because I suck that hard at this game. But nonetheless, you should put the respawn point AFTER the dialouge.

NegativeONE responds:

When I launch my site, I plan to release another revision of this game. Due to popular demand, dialogue will be skipped when you respawn. Thanks for your input :)